WHY THE ZODIAC IS REAL

and any argument that tries to defy it is a social construct

Okay. We all know the zodiac right? The twelve signs, celestial spheres, natal chart, horoscopes, astrology, you name it.

Over centuries, humans are constantly finding ways to measure things whether it is the interaction of chemical elements as in the periodic table or the movement and placement of the stars as in the natal chart.

Then why does one count as a serious science while the other is not? There is only one answer to that and it is our JUDGEMENT. Our judgment towards what, you may ask?

Our judgment towards WOMEN (and possibly any mother, I’m gonna make you all guilty for this). You see, the zodiac and natal chart are based on your birth year, month, day, place of birth, and the exact time when your mother precisely gave birth to you. It is your akta kelahiran but we made it about stars.

Your akta kelahiran will be used a lot for legal and governmental purposes, so why don’t the zodiac? (Laugh. At this point I know this is a pure logical fallacy, I’m aware of it).

Back to your birthday.

Ignore the sketchy off-brand website which I took my reference from. It is still LEGIT and you CANNOT say otherwise. Look! They use Arial instead of Comic Sans of course they’re being serious there.

At any given time of the year, the relative position of the earth, sun, and moon at the time of birth/conception may HAVE an effect on the personality. Just because of the feelings, atmospheres, and circumstances of the mother during that specific season and period of the year.

Much like your own unique eclipse that you can analyze over and over. They analyze eclipses too there at Bosscha, don’t they?

Studies have argued that the moon’s gravity may affect women’s menstruation cycle as in PMS so obviously, the emotions of the mother play a big role and certainly will affect their newly born child's personality.

You all don’t want to argue against MOTHERS, don’t you?

See, way back before we find ways for doctors and gynecologists to help the process of birth. Mothers were usually helped by what we called dukun beranak or in any other culture known as a WITCH.

We all already know witches do a lot of stuff, right? They were deemed as too weird, too quirky, and way ahead of their time. People (NORMIES) that mostly are gendered as male were not so happy for or disturbed by or feel the need to get rid of them (even BURN them).

As in our shallow understanding of it in religion, in this case, I’ll be using mine, Islam. So we’re here to defend our misunderstood manic-pixie dream girls. The hipsters. Peculiar women. That is in line with the spirit of FEMINISM.

WITCHES, masters of the zodiac, are the perfect symbol for anyone who wants to subvert the status quo and proclaim that they belong to themselves. The passion for originality. Staying true and honest with yourself. Non-conformist. And we all should strive to STAND by it!

EXHIBIT 1. My Mom and I, just like any other mother-daughter relationship, are complex. But The Pattern (the zodiac app) has succeeded to give a highly specific and personalized picture of it and has helped me connect with her better ever since.

Humans need outlines in their life, so why not try the zodiac? consider it, at least? no?

The same goes for me and our EXHIBIT 2. Ernest Hemingway. We have the same exact natal chart and I feel a unique resemblance to him to the extent that I copied a lot of his traits as mine. Again, The Pattern has helped me find steps to realize it.

So to wrap it up. It’s 100% proven, OK?

The zodiac is not a Barnum effect.

It’s not a pseudoscience.

But the divine truth.

You’re welcome for the laugh.